Mars is Looking for an Apartment to Rent

Why hello there, you lovely cats and rats and deities… My name is Mars Fargo. Looking for a 3rd or 4th roommate? Have to leave my current place soon, since the roommates want my bedroom to adopt/raise a kid in (June 1st). Don’t own much in the way of belongings, so shouldn’t be a massive move. I will warn you, my fellow mortals, that you ought to know all of the following about me. Specifically, I am… 1. Insufferably autistic 2. Suffer from a chronic addiction to coffee, crackers, and sarsaparilla 3. Have an obsessively growing collection of clocks, hats, suits, ties, motion picture discs, music pressings, and transformers 4. Would absolutely take a bullet for a Mountain Gorilla 5. Do, in fact, actually dress (and talk) like this ALL of the time… like, even to the dentist (no, I am not kidding) 5½. Cannot confirm or deny my demographic status as an extraterrestrial (at this time) 6. May or may not have attempted, unsuccessfully, to build a working TARDIS 7. Respect and love all peoples, religions, races, sexualities, genders, and all other forms of sentient life (if this bothers you, do not waste my time speaking to me) Oh, and one more thing before I forget… 8. Insufferably MEXICAN (racists begone) If none of the above details put you off or prompt an irk of disgust, we may make a great match! I’d be happy to get in touch with any interested parties in the Lakewood area.